Friday, 5 August 2011


The Big O loooves his Playmobile, what good German kid doesn't, I ask you?

And his Polizei van and figurines are things he is particularly obsessed fond of.

The other day, Big O came into the kitchen.....(which is where I am usually to be found.... it is sparkling, smells good and has many pots of nutritous goodness boiling on the stove)......and asked where his policevomit was.

(??????) I told him it was probably in his room. He looked. And came out immediately,
 'NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO policevomit!!'
ME: 'Ummm.....Did you look under the bed?'

He was starting to look a little angry, this scares me, I don't do tantrums well (unless I'm throwing them, then I rather enjoy them).


ME: 'I'm sorry baby, what is policevomit? You want your policevomit I know, but what is it?'

BIG O: 'POLICEVOMITPOLICEVOMITPOLLICEVOMIT'.... fall upon the ground, flail arms and legs, turn purple yadda yadda.

I was starting to get that hot sweaty thing going, you know, when you're cooking exotic (pasta) and you're  experimenting with the side dish (tomato sauce) and adding your special herbs and spices (salt)....
So I stopped and drew an arm across my pained, sweaty brow.

ME: 'Ok ok ok ok, lets go look, Mama find it.'

 BIG O: 'Ok.'

So we hold hands (us) and sniff tearfully (me), and go look for the policevomit in the loungeroom.

BIG O: 'There, there mummy, there!' As he runs over to a small blue Playmobile man. 'Here Mummy, policeMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN'.

 ME: ' Ummm ...U-huh....ummm. Good! We found it!'


I knew that was too good to be true.

ME: 'Ok ok ok, lets keep it here? it here? it....oh, hang on, WAIT just a MINUTE!!!'

ME: 'Do you mean THIS?'

BIG O: 'MAMAMAMAMAMA! There, there, policevomit!!!'

And because I try to be a good mother, I bit my tongue and did not tell him
 'You know, this is actually a Lufthansa Vomitpilot...' becasue imagination is a vital part of childhood and growth, and becomes invaluable, when, as an adult, you imgaine yourself on a Tahitian beach sipping cocktails under gently swaying palm fronds and arranging your Elle Macpherson body just so on your banana bed..... (like I said imagination is KEY)....and not on your hands and knees looking for policevomit while your kitchen has, no doubt, by now caught on fire....and so.... instead I said 'You're welcome baby'.

1 comment:

  1. i love this,i laughed my head off, can you please talk this on video! u have a laptop cam, dont u?please just read it, tell it again ans set on a channel on youtube and you will become famous. basta.. :)